Aaron Rogers Determined to Play with Crutches

Aaron Rodgers played only 4 snaps for the New York Jets before he tore his ACL. Aaron is so determined to make it back to the field that he is petitioning the league to allow players to wear crutches on the field. Toby Shmilkas, a spokesperson for Mr. Rodgers explained the petition, “We feel it is a disservice to the league to not allow Aaron to play for the Jets. Therefore, Aaron should be allowed an exception to either play with crutches and or a boot with a mobile scooter.  Sure, we have our detractors out there saying that Aaron will get killed but that is why he will be the first player in history of the NFL to use flags for tackling. We are selling this idea that even if God forbid Aaron gets killed on the field, the positive would be that it would boost the NFL ratings even more when that kid in Buffalo died and came back to life.”

We checked in with New York Jets fans for comment and some guy name Paully said, “fugget about it! He’s done, stick a fork in the son of a bitch!” Other fans were more optimistic like Sully from Long Island, “I can see that mother f er on crutches making better plays than any other quarterback on our team, so I am all for that big headed Cheesey bastard taking the field in cructches or in a boot.”

The biggest fear the NFL has is, if they allow Aaron to play on crutches or in a boot on a scooter, does that mean someone like Tua gets to play in a bubble to protect him from concussions. The NFL is seriously concerned about where this would end if they allowed it to happen.