Both Teams

Henry Mathers has found what he calls the cheat code of life or what his boyfriend Tom calls “FayGay” or fake gay. These two heterosexual beings have decided that life is better by being classified as gay. We asked Henry to help us understand this and he explained, “At first, I lived 30 years of my life as a straight male and all was great, but then I got married and that is when the shit hit the fan. I no longer was having sex unless it was to procreate and when she found out we couldn’t conceive our sex lives died in the process. I loved to watch sports and that was not allowed as my wife had other plans even on fall Sundays during the NFL season.  Fantasy Football was like my sex life was dead to me as was hanging out with my friends. My life turned around when a friend of my wife said she caught me with another woman on a date. It turns out I have a doppelganger or a guy who looks just like me, so my wife accused me of cheating on her and I didn’t even deny it because I knew I had my out and so I took it. After the divorce I hung out with my college buddy Tom who loves to joke around and would pretend to be my boyfriend when I would talk to woman. Turns out woman want what they can’t have and so when they would think I was gay they tried hard to get me in the sack, little did they know, they didn’t have to try that hard. After Tom and I saw this in action Tom and I never looked back.I now have more sex (with woman) than I ever had as an out gay male and I get to watch sports all the time with my asexual boyfriend Tom all the fucking time. Being a FayGay is the best of both worlds, more sports and more sex with woman and no commitments. We have bought in so much so that we even started a gay pride march in our town, we are not just allies of the community, we are a part of the community minus the gay sex part.”