Chicago Bears Suffer Massive Team Layoff!

The Bears historically have been a team with great history. Who can forget the likes of Ditka…..Sayers……Payton……and many other iconic players. As of today, the front office laid off the entire team (even Gus the maintenance guy was let go for the locker room for smelling like shit). The beginning of the season has been a disaster. The front office had this to say, “We were in the process of laying folks off at the front office and some fat guy named Stuart who sells pizza down the street at The Eastern said…layoff the entire team……so that is what we are going with!” This is the first time in NFL history a team has had mass layoffs with the players. We also learned that Mike Tomczak would like to come out of retirement and get back to the game. Additionally, Larry Jordan (Michaels brother) is in the process of getting out of the medical device industry to take a stab at being an NFL player. Even more strange, some lady named Margot wants to be a kicker……..we met her at The Eastern with Stuart while both of them were getting high and drawing a blueprint of a blueprint. A lot of odd things going on in Chicago right now. At least the Bears will be moving their stadium to the local YMCA for next season. Should be great year! Go Margot!