Conversion?

The Pope is practicing Judaism and Catholics are up in arms. According to a Vatican insider, “The Pope has always had an affinity for Judaism ever since he put lox on a bagel, he just knew he wanted to be a Jewish. As the Pope, he gets his message from the man upstairs and for years he secretly tells me that he is told to become Jewish. He says the almighty tells him that it is okay because his son was once one and so too could he become one. The Pope fears the backlash that he could receive from Catholics around the world especially the rabid students at Notre Dame should he change teams. So, for now he will secretly light shabbat candles and sip on some Matzoh Ball soup in the dark.” In a month, he is willing to have a full “Public Circumcision Realtime” and it will be nationally televised and replayed at movie theaters across the country. The pope insists he wants no anesthesia and this raises concerns with the Vatican.