Not really satire.

Not really satire.

Lifestyle

Escape Camp

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By Jack Firestone


Summer will be here before you know it and sleep away camps are big business. Camps are constantly looking for ways to compete for parent’s dollars, so they are constantly looking for ways to separate themselves from the pack. Sports camps are all over the place, art camps are out there as well, if you can think of it, there’s a camp for it. Fred Hyde or as he likes to be called, Uncle Fred, has come up with the most unique camp we could find. He has combined escape rooms and summer camps and come up with Escape Camp. We reached out to Uncle Fred for comment about his new camp, “Escape Camp is like no other camp out there, first off it is not that expensive and so much fun. Now that I think about it, that’s our new tag line, Half the price and twice the fun. We take an old outdated warehouse where we setup the most extensive and time consuming escape room. Before arrival we ask parents not to tell them what kind of camp it is, to enhance their experience. The first week is all about preparation, we teach the kids the necessities, like how to pick locks, wire electrical, put up drywall, how to start a fire, how to kill and prep a chicken or small animal to eat and most importantly we teach he kids how to administer CPR. You’d be amazed at how many parents never read the waiver, I mean they just sign it and have no clue what’s in it.”        

We asked Uncle Fred to take us inside his escape room but he said he couldn’t and explained why, “I cannot give away our secrets but I can tell you a little of how we start the process. First thing we do is have the kids destroy the existing drywall in an effort to find a hidden key. The key opens a special room with supplies like wiring equipment, power saws  and new drywall which sets the tone for the next set of challenges. This escape room s designed to take at a minimum of 4 weeks but we have had teams at other rooms take up to 2 years. The experiences these kids take home are incredible, just ask Timothy Alford about how he saved another kids thumb from having to be amputated or about how he revived his new girlfriend Catherine after she was shocked while wiring a break room.”

Escape Camp is going on it’s third year and already offering scholarships to allow for more kids to participate in this unique camp. Time will tell whether this will be the camp of the future as this business is cut throat. According rival Uncle Al from Camp LeJune jr, a military summer camp, “Escape Camp is more like an internment camp than a fun camp.”

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