Not really satire.

Not really satire.

Sports

Golf Defender

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By Jack Firestone


Some sports just are not that exciting as others. For example, Bowling just does not have the same excitement that football as, the same holds true for golf. That is where Alex Young of Action Sports comes in, as he is dedicated to making what he calls dull sports way more exciting. Alex explained, “watching a guy hit a golf ball is not too thrilling but at Action Sports, we add defense on the putting green. The golfer you are paired with has to stand 10 feet from the ball, but once contact is made he gets an opportunity to to kick the ball. The kicker is (pardon the pun), the person putting can then tackle the defender to allow his ball to reach the hole. Once the ball stops no more kicking or tackling and you can repeat if it does not go in. We went to tackle only after Johnny Beatle hit the defender over the head with his putter, 38 stitches later and we changed the rule.”

Alex Young and his team are still working out detail of how they are going to add defense to bowling. Alex discussed, “After Paul Beamon died on the lane, we knew we needed to change our approach to how we could spice up bowling. We are currently looking into adding a pistol which can be used to shoot the ball with a rubber bullet as we have tried to use a real bullet but after it ricocheted and took out a bowling alley’s employee’s eye we thought the rubber would be much safer. Another sport we think we can bring excitement to is track and field. Picture the 100 yard dash and the lead runner is taken out by a competitor’s marble or a baseball thrown at them, tv numbers would go through the roof.”

Action Sports is open to any and every idea and asks that if you have a sport that you find unwatchable, that you contact them and they will gladly come up with an idea that will add excitement.

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