Hawaiian Firefighter Swept Away
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Recently in Wailuku Hawaii, nearly 13 inches of rain fell on parts of Maui.
A crew went to help a flooded home when a firefighter fell into a 4-foot-wide storm drain. Then he was carried about 800 yards (8 Football fields) where he drained into the ocean.
He was later retrieved from the shoreline, and transported to a hospital. So far, we only have the following details:
· It took a while for the Ambulance to get to the hospital due to all the WLLT (Wailuku looky-loo traffic).
· When they heard about the fall and the 800 yards trajectory, they immediately got on the phone and called Tom Brady and asked him, “If you were to pass a 210-pound Hawaiian into a storm drain, 800 yards, where would you expect him to end up?” Sure enough, after a few questions about wind trajectory and if the guy played any college football, Brady’s best guess was right on and that’s where they found him. The GOAT came through again!
· Charles Barkley, who is an honorary volunteer firefighter back home in Alabama, chimed in with these words of wisdom. “Them firefighters are too damn skinny. They should make sure all firefighters are more than 4 feet wide and then you won’t have none of them sliding down no storm drains.”
· It really caught Hawaiians off guard, even though it happens all the time, every time, and Hawaii is called the wettest place on the planet. The mayor said, “OK so Wailuku literally means ‘water that destroys’ but can you please give it a rest? I mean we built a lot of golf courses here! Enough with the destroyer water already!”
· The local weatherman said nearly 13 inches of rain fell over a 24-hour period, matching the tears that fell in Dallas last weekend after the Cowboys routine exit from the playoffs.
· The hospital has received a ton of spam immediately after taking him in. Not the junk mail, but actual cans of Spam as thousands of Hawaiians sent them in in support.
