Hockey Coverage at SEMI

By Jel Michaels

In the past ten years no sport has increased in television ratings and viewership, live attendance, brand recognition, revenue, and just overall demand than Hockey. Hockey Night is no longer just observed in Canada. As the rush of Hockey explodes in the US, other countries are seeing the surge in popularity as well, none more than the small country of San Emilia Miranda Iliana (SEMI) in Mid-Southern Southwest Central America.

When Krokus Satellite Systems finally brought worldwide television coverage to SEMI in August of 2022, the entire country took to the NHL Network as the most watched channel in Krokus’ lineup. Granted, Krokus only carries the Scientology channel, Krokus News Network (set to launch in 2025), Krokus Movie Network (set to launch in 2025), and the NHL Network, but nonetheless the country has gone Hockey-Nuts! As a side note, another trend is the entire country collectively thumbing its nose at modern medicine. In the short time that the sport has shown a presence in SEMI, President Alejandro “Buck” Pasqual has already declared Hockey the country’s national sport.

He is actively recruiting the country’s best players to build a core team that he plans to have ready for competition in 2025. And he is aiming high! The NHL!!! That’s right… he has already been in talks with Gary Bettman, the NHL Commissioner, to become the 33rd team in the NHL. Player selection has been difficult thus far, as President Pasqual is insisting on only icing local talent. He is refusing to bring any talent in from outside. He insists that the first SEMI NHL team will consist only of SEMI countrymen. A team official states, “It will be a daunting task since ice skating hasn’t even been a ‘thing’ here for more than four months.” Gigan Water, Shaft Tools, and Lucinda Foods are all major stakeholders in the team. With Shaft Tools being the majority investing company, they will have the naming rights to the stadium. The SEMI Shaft Dome will be erected in December of 2024.