In Memoriam

It’s Oscar time. The Academy Awards. A night of glitz and glam. A night where we little people watch in expectation for even the slightest glimpses of those that we are forced to believe are far better than we are. A night where the rich and famous, who partake in make-believe for a living, congratulate each other for being so great at pretending.

There is however one point in the evening during the Oscars that does pull at our heartstrings. That 45-second spot where we get to remember those in the Industry that have passed on this past year. The “In Memoriam.”

This year’s awards will be including an added attraction… the “Fauxmoriam.” A special part of the show where we pay tribute to those we thought were dead.

Some on the list will include:

Peter Ostrim: The star who played “Charlie” in “Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory.” NOT DEAD! He is now a Dairy Veterinarian.

Taran Noah Smith: “Mark Taylor,” Tim Allen’s TV son from “Home Improvement.” NOT DEAD! He is now a Carpenter.

Michael Schoeffling: The object of Molly Ringwald’s desire, “Jake Ryan,” from “Sixteen Candles.” NOT DEAD! He is now also a Carpenter.

Lark Voorhies: “Lisa,” one of the School-Six from “Saved By The Bell.” NOT DEAD! She is trying to become a writer (but studying carpentry, just in case).

Andrew Shue: The “Melrose Place” actor who played “Billy Campbell” (a carpenter on the show). NOT DEAD! He is an online co-founder of Cafemom; a website focusing on parenting and women’s interests. He is also famous for living in the shadow of his older sister, Elisabeth Shue (also NOT DEAD!) 

See you at the AVN’s!!!