Joey Chestnut Choking Last Night

Joey Chestnut was seen choking on Halsted and Division in Chicago. Surprisingly, he was choking on vegetarian hot dogs. We caught up with him and here is what he had to say, “I am sick of real hot dogs…..actually, I am sick of eating in general……but I figured if I choked and died from eating veggie dogs there would be no real punch line…..so I am admitting, I tried to end up my life from veggie dogs…..not by way ok choking, more or less from just the taste of them….well, I am alive and well…..gearing up for next year for my nitrate consumption and once again, taking the biggest shit of my life…again….I have only barfed once at Coney Island and it was on my dead grandma….she died that day…..not from my barfing, but from trying to end her life from veggie dogs!”