MENSA..I Mean MENSUH

By Jack Firestone

Today’s society is all about inclusivity and companies and organizations are trying to jump on the bandwagon. Mensa, the IQ society has come under fire for being a very exclusive club and not accessible to most people. The geniuses at Mensa have figured out a way to get more inclusive and increase profitability at the same time. Mensa has started a new company called Mensuh, designed specifically for people with a low IQ 85 or below.

Leonard Saltz, the head of the new company explained the idea behind Mensuh, “We kept getting calls on how to join Mensa and realized the people who where calling were idiots. Smart people understand how to look us up on the internet, not the people who were calling us. The same people would call us several times even after we explained to them how Mensa worked. My colleague Heather Peters, who is a genius, came up with the idea of creating Mensuh, for the idiots who kept calling us all day. We charge them a $50 sign up fee and a $9.99 reoccurring monthly fee to be a part of this idiotic club, because they are too dumb to realize they are being charged a monthly fee and keep paying. We have a whole line of clothing dedicated to Mensuh and it is truly amazing how many of them want to show it off to their friends. The clothing alone brings in enough money to offset our annual holiday party, open bar included. At first, we sold the shirts with no hole for their heads, but we felt that was wrong. Next thing we sold them was a shirt that said, “I am we Todd did” on the front and “I am sofa king we Todd did on the back”(have someone read that out loud to you) however it got canceled because of the use or insinuation of the R word.

Time will tell if this new exclusive organization will take off. We do know that if it’s up to the idiot’s, this will be the next big thing and that is the genius of it.