NFL Startling Last-Minute Partnership

Tonight, the NFL season kicks off with the defending Super Bowl Champions hosting the Detroit Lions.  For the first time in the history of the game, there will be two significant changes that will be fairly noticeable for both the fans and the players.

The players will be using a Nerf football.  Along with the Nerf football, a few changes will occur.  First, if there is a fumble and the ball is torn in half during the scuffle, the team that comes away with the larger half of the ball will retain possession.  The new ball in play will be chosen by a child under 12, who may choose any color Nerf football that is available on the sidelines.

In addition, all players will be wearing Nerf pads instead of the normal protective pads.  While this may be a change for the players, Travis Kelce, who is questionable for this evening’s game, is quoted as saying, “It’ll be kinda cool, actually.  It’ll be like wearing pillows, and c’mon, who doesn’t like pillows?”

However, special teams will have to adjust their game plan, as field goal attempts may be a bit more difficult when kicking a Nerf. “We’re definitely looking forward to the challenge,’ said Lions head coach, Dan Campbell.

It’s time to relive your childhood, fans.  Kickoff is just hours away!