Politics Shmolitics…

You think things are weird when it comes to politics, laws, and policies? Here are a few actual laws in Texas that will make you piss your pants or blow milk through your nose. Keep in mind, these are 100% TRUE! Nothing in this article is made up.

1. It is against the law to eat your neighbor’s garbage. You can rifle through their trash looking for things that may be to your benefit. But if the cops find you eating discarded food or beverages, you will be arrested and have to pay a steep fine.

2. A couple can be proclaimed legally married even if one of the other spouses is not present for the ceremony… as long as they are not related to each other. 

3. It is a violation and a $5.00 fine if you are found walking barefoot in a public place. It is considered a violation of the state “sanitation and appearance” code. 

4. In El Paso, Texas, spittoons are required in churches, assembly halls, hotels, banks, stores, train depots, and all saloons. In the past there was an ordinance requiring a certain number of spittoons in these public buildings based on square footage. But El Paso has really caught up to modern ways. They only need one spittoon in these public facilities as long as there is signage directing the public as to where the spittoons are located. 

5. You are no longer allowed to shoot buffalo from the second story balcony of any hotel or motel. DAMN IT!!! Although this is the definition of the law, no one is sure if this applies to other floors of the hotels.

6. It is completely legal to drive any motorized vehicle without a windshield. Obviously, this is bizarre when it comes to automobiles. The odd part of this law is that even though no windshield is required, it is illegal not to have windshield wipers.

7. It is illegal in the town of Borger, TX to throw confetti, rubber balls, and firecrackers in city limits.

8. In Mesquite, Texas, it is illegal for children to sport “unusual” haircuts. There is no defined example of “unusual” in this law. I guess it depends on the opinions of the police and judge.

9. And finally, in Texarkana. When riding your horse in a public place, daytime or nighttime, you must have working taillight attached to your horse’s rear over the tail. 

Having lived in Dallas for the past 15 years, I am glad to say that I have only broken one of these laws. I am sure that after reading through these you can tell which is the most obvious and lenient. Luckily, I was not arrested or had to pay the fine.

What are you gonna do? Sometimes your neighbor just throws away perfectly good treats.