Seattle Police Now Hiring Mimes

Due to recent backlash of Seattle Police officers being caught on camera and audio making unsavory comments to citizens, the Seattle Police Department has made a radical change in their hiring practices. They are now hiring mimes.

“Since technology was brought into law enforcement, it has only hurt our officers ability to do their jobs effectively, ” stated Police Chief Adrian Diaz. “Many of our officers have been judged for momentary lapses in judgement, akin to ‘locker room’ talk. Therefore we are making a change in our desired officer profile. Our officers will be required to communicate with civilians without words, but with gestures only.”

Seattle Police Officers Guild has posted on their website and social media channels hiring events taking place at Pike Place Market, the Seattle Mime Meetup and Teatro ZinZanni.