Six is The New Three

For as long as I can remember, I’ve had an obsession with three. I have three kids, three dogs, and I like eating M&Ms in multiples of threes. Three is not even my favorite number. That would be lucky 13, the number that adorned my high school jerseys. But, three is a number that makes me feel safe, comfortable and somehow aligned with the universe. 

Yet as I just stumbled groggily to the bathroom after one of my dogs woke me with her puking sounds (sounds that immediately awaken any dog or human mom), I realized that maybe this obsession with the number three must stop. I had been right in the middle of an elusive dream, too. Ugh.

I looked at my phone, and it was 3:03 am. How many times have I woken up at 3:00 am, 3:03 am or 3:33 am?  Real clever and comforting, huh? Not so much at 52 years old! I’m exhausted. Plus, I don’t fall back asleep like a carefree child. My mind starts racing. I worry if the dog is sick.

Then, my mind jumps to the dog choking on her vomit, her dying, the autopsy I ask to be performed, the subsequent and exorbitant vet bills and, of course, the never-ending river of tears and grief. Once my dramatic writer’s mind calms down a bit, I start thinking about what I have to do in the morning. I scroll through Instagram. I play word games on my phone. It is now 4:03 a.m.

Oh, my dear and beloved number three … You have been by my side, providing such a delicate safety net in a chaotic world full of uncertainty. For decades, you blanketed my superstitious and whimsical thoughts with a sense of comfort and peace. But, perhaps now it is time that we take a break. I’m not ending our rare and treasured connection. This isn’t an abrupt breakup at all. It’s just a step back — a moment to reflect. 

As I lay here typing this departure note to my adored three, I realize that by closing this door, another may soon swing open. Ah, yes. I am manifesting it now! I go to bed at 11 pm and am crave the elusive seven hours of sleep touted by so many experts. Universe, let’s have a new relationship with the number six. How much I yearn to instead by awakened at 6 am. 

Yes. Six is my new three (and, “surprisingly,” it just happens to be a welcomed multiple of my sacred number). Bring it, six! I welcome you here in my obsessive mind with open arms. I will knock on wood, sigh with relief and bestow constant adoration upon you, especially when the dog chooses you the next time she has to puke.