Not really satire.

Not really satire.

Healthcare News

SP (Sober Public) Opens its Doors to Members

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AA has helped save many lives….marriages…..families and help get many people back on track and away from addiction. SP or “Sober Public” is a new organization that helps people who don’t drink have a public forum to speak in large group settings. All meetings are at local juice bars and in some cases in padded cells (not drinking can cause brain damage). We spoke with Lisa Poifect about her experience at SP meetings and here is what she had to say, “I am now 35 years Sober Public….two years ago I cheated on my husband….I was 100% sober during the entire process…..that same year I robbed two banks in the burbs……a third one in the city and that was unplanned….I was 100% coherent….by being SP, I never have really missed any experiences or ever gotten a DUI…admittedly, I just got out of jail for the robberies…..I was 100% sober when I watched Morgan Freeman dig a hole and end up a in a filthy sewer………Well, I don’t drink and have to admit I still love rubber cement…..shit smells good like gasoline…..so what I glued my dad to the fridge….I got 100% on that fnnnn project!”

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