Summer Heat Challenges The World

Due to extreme temperatures across the United States, the United Safety Council is asking local officials to adopt a mid-day clothes optional, where citizens can drop their clothes without being at risk of getting arrested. Safety Council president Mark Mayawurds explained, “the heat has already caused far too many deaths across the United States, and we feel that clothes are the main cause and must be eliminated to save lives. The world will be a safer place when you are nude in the summer. We thought it was more important to save the young women of our country and wanted it to be mandatory for all women 21 to 40 years of age, but our advisory board voted that down and got HR involved. We have started a campaign to let everyone know that when the temps true is above 90 degrees clothes is optional. Turns out there are not many people who believe me when I tell them. I have already suggested to my council that we hire 5 naked women to go around with me to make others feel more comfortable. We are just waiting for HR to get back to us about that idea.”

Time will tell if this new option will be taken advantage around the country. However, Mark Mayawurds is coming under fire for his leadership and many people are asking how a college kid who recently got kicked out of his fraternity for sexual harassment became the head of such a prestigious council.