Tackling Prohibited in The NFL Starting This Season

The NFL will no longer allow tackling in any games during the regular season or at all. Players will be forced when near another player to not tackle…..but, rather hug the opposing player gently and opposing defensive coordinator if they are near by. Players will also be allowed to whisper softly into other players ears (and the opposing defensive coordinator if near by)….and important stipulation is to use quotes from Jeffery Dahmer or Andy Rooney (2 choices per season). These new rules were talked about when Peyton Manning left the game. Some say that he is the main influence to these new rules. The good news, players are less injury prone and are more likely to find a great love for dissecting baby pigs or watching old 60 minutes episodes that were less than 60 minutes (there were several). The NFL has also forced all quarterbacks to be blindfolded on specifically pass plays. Since there is no tackling this poses no dangers to quarterbacks……however, this limits the chances for a completed pass. There is also a new rule that forces all fans watching from the their home to do home improvements in their neighborhood with no HOA approval or permits of any kind. Nobody truly understands that rule and the HOA is contesting it for the moment with the NFL, ACDC and the PLO which is all tied to Pickleball. Even the guy writing this article has no idea what the f$@@% any of this means.  The NFL is striving to make it fun for the athletes and the fans. A great season is ahead!