Someone Has To Laugh
In shocking news from the hallowed halls of Elite Boarding School for the Privileged and Mildly Unsupervised, Cher’s 49-year-old son Elijah Allman was arrested after allegedly causing a disturbance in the dining hall. Yes. Forty-nine. Police say Allman faces multiple misdemeanor charges, including assault, criminal trespass, and criminal threatening, which feels ambitious for a man […]
WASHINGTON — One year after Attorney General Pam Bondi proudly handed out white binders labeled “The Epstein Files: Phase 1” to a flock of MAGA influencers, Americans are still waiting for Phase 2, which officials are now describing as “very conceptual.” President Donald Trump addressed the missing sequel Thursday. “Phase 2 is happening,” Trump assured […]
WASHINGTON – In a bold step for people who think scientists are just nerds with opinions, President Trump announced the government will no longer consider climate change a danger to humans. Standing next to a very excited EPA Administrator Lee Zeldin, Trump proudly erased the 2009 “endangerment finding,” a 200-page scientific report that said greenhouse […]
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