Toys

Sex toy mogul Willie P. Sexton is doing the lords work according to lonely men across the globe. When we say lonely, we are including married men. Willie is now trying to help sexually frustrated people enjoy the art of self-pleasure by creating sex toys that pose as other things. Willie explained his newest line of sex toys called Hidden in Plain Sight for his/her/they pleasure, “One of the biggest obstacles to our clients purchasing our toys is the fear of having their wife, husband or worse yet kids or even worse parents find their toys. Sure, you think you can hide your stuff, but those nosey fuckers look everywhere when you aren’t around. Nothing worse than walking in on your kid checking out your flesh light or dildo and trying to explain it away as though you bought it as a gag gift for a party. You probably should have cleaned it before you stored it though. Now with my new line you get off clean free with the evidence hidden in plain sight. The flesh light now comes in a can labeled anal wart cream. Our dildos slip into the back of a fake mag light. Our newest vibrator is shaped like a kids baseball bat and comes in all Major League Baseball team logos. Our pocket rocket looks like a rocket and shape shifts into its intended use like a transformer but for sex toys.”

These toys, especially the new vibrators are creating quite the buzz at Sexy Con Las Vegas. Willie promises his buyers that they will cum and come back for more toys and he guarantees his products for life and they even have a trade-in policy for slightly used products.