Trader Joe’s is Opening a New Phoenix Location

Trader Joe’s is set to open a new location in Phoenix. The new location will be at the top of Camelback Mountain. Corporate is issuing a city mandate that would allow customers to only enter the new location by helicopter or parachute. We spoke with Velma, a new excited customer anticipating the new store, “I plan to skydive with out a parachute. If I die, I did it my way and not the way my husband wanted. He keeps trying to persuade me to jump off a building and land on a sharp object. His idea is interesting. Divorce is in the works regardless. Love my Marty. Hate his brother and parents. Probably why I invited them to join me at the Trader Joe’s opening.”