YOOGLE Launches!
Share
YOOGLE Launches!
Google has clearly become a household name on a global scale. It has also made every person in the world lazy as shit (we just repeated what someone said). The founder of Yoogle, William Noteazee has found this problem huge and finally identified a solution. This resulted in building an aftermarket software platform for every computer that changes the game when it comes to using the Google.
The second you add YOOGLE to your computer it alters Google just by a tad. What happens next is brilliant and will clearly change every user’s experience searching for critical information.
YOOGLE creates an environment for every Google search where an AI voice speaks through your audio for 8 seconds. The AI voice will communicate several variations of language, but the most common phrase is “You are lazy as shit, figure it out yourself……you have 1 hour”. This is just the beginning of the process as you could imagine.
Each end-user initially has 1 hour to gather the information they are searching for at that moment. If they cannot find the information, YOOGLE turns the power off in their home for 2 days. YOOGLE already has bridged relationships with all the major electrical companies nationwide. After the first search YOOGLE only gives you 30 minute to find your information. The “punishment” varies based on age demographic. For example, college age boys are punished by not being able obtain information is freeze their ability to purchase Vaseline for 12 months. This has greatly increased productivity among college age boys over the last year.
For people over 50 that fail to locate the information, it gets fairly complicated…they are pressured to learn fluent Hungarian (hardest foreign language to learn according to some lady named Olga we met while visiting Hungry). Then, the individual is forced to use the language at work for a full year. Essentially, they are forbidden to speak English at work for a full year. Once again, work productivity among American’s is finally shooting through the roof.
Mas Retsalf had this to say after using the platform, “I already speak Hungarian…with that said, I don’t give a shit…however, I am grateful my college aged son received his most recent punishment…finally we have a full container of Vaseline in the house…….he has always hogged it….obviously for the dry skin on his face”
The future of YOOGLE looks good and investors continue to line up. As you would guess, Vaseline will take on the largest equity position.
