In what can only be described as a tragedy, a local man made a catastrophic mistake today when he accidentally sent a dick pick to his own wife. The picture in question, which can now be found circulating the internet thanks to his enraged, soon-to-be ex-wife, was intended for the man’s girlfriend on the side. […]
At Wescott Elementary in Northbrook Illinois 3 kids were diagnosed with “Cooties”. The entire school was evacuated. In each instance, the kids got them from the same kid. His name is Billy Boogershnot. Here is what Billy had to say, “Look, if you are near me…I am wiping that shit on you…….at least cooties go […]
At a press conference this afternoon, a team of scientists from the Winston-Salem-Marlboro-Chapman Institute for Social Research and Advancements in Smoking in association with Anheuser Busch, claimed to have successfully isolated the gene that allows for healthy smoking. “Have you ever noticed that some smokers live cancer free forever, while others don’t?” the Leading Researcher […]