The Federal Government Lays Off Every Michigan Employee (Public and Private Sector) For Rooting for Michigan
The federal government has swiftly approved a new law that will lay off every employed person in the state of Michigan. The feds believe this is a step in the right direction for Michigan fans. There is a bylaw that allows Michigan residents to get their job back if they continue to be Michigan fans that just was approved. If you are Michigan resident and Michigan fan and want your job back, you have to do the following:
- Wear a jock strap on the outside of your pants for a year (this applies to both men and women)
- Men will have to walk around stating “My penis is not small, just take a closer look, it is big if you get closer” – (only applies to men and a very small population of women that have been contacted)
- Michigan women will have to kick men in the balls on the hour, every hour to be reinstated to their fulltime job
- Men have to scream as loud as they can in the local library “You can do anything you want to me, please don’t touch my nipples”
The state government in Michigan is baffled by these new laws, but will abide by them accordingly. Go Bucks!
