Dicey Financials For Spirit Airlines

Spirit Airlines is in financial trouble because of the rising fuel prices. Spirit Airlines is contemplating new strategies to manage the difficult financial times ahead. MediaPub Live has spoken with the head of Spirit Airlines marketing Department Paul McCormick and this is what he had to say, “We have squeezed our customers out of every penny we could but with fuel prices going up we are going to have squeeze a little harder. We are trying to see if we can save money on fuel by making our planes more fuel efficient. One way we think we could do this is by replacing our current doors with screen doors. That could save us a lot of money per flight. Our recent college hire Johnny Stevens has a great idea of charging a dollar per article of clothing. He proposes that this idea will increase revenue 3-fold. 1,  just the money per article of clothing will help raise revenue by millions of dollars. 2, People will wear less clothes which means less weight and more fuel-efficient flights. Third, male demand will go up as women will wear less clothes, which is self explanatory. All these changes will hopefully take place soon, so we can survive these high fuel prices. We also now have a chippendale dancers lounge in the back of the plane. All the tips go directly to spirit airlines. Man can Larry dance! We are now exploring catheter bags for every passenger and paid live stream video content for every moment a passenger defecates. Viral videos can be a strong revenue source for Spirit”.