“Nobody humiliates America 4-1 and keeps their waffles.” – Donald J Trump WASHINGTON, DC – Following the United States‘ humiliating 4-1 World Cup loss to Belgium, an enraged President Donald Trump announced the immediate launch of “Operation Belgium Freedom,“ a radical plan to abolish anything Belgium-related from American life. Standing before reporters with a black […]
We spoke with Trump and here is what he had to say, “This is fantastic. I am into culture and into grabbing the cervix (I can’t say bad words anymore). The Iranians are beautiful people. So endearing and let you in once you are close enough. Mojtaba Khamenei is enjoying the company of Melania. He […]
Just this morning, the fatality of Officer Spermen is a mystery. After eating 13 donuts, he was later found dead right outside of the local donut shop in Lincolnwood, Illinois in his cruiser drenched in coffee and donut vomit. We spoke with the captain of his division and here is what he had to say, […]