WASHINGTON, DC – In a move that legal experts are calling “technically constitutional, but bona fide comical,” the Federal Communications Commission announced that talk shows must now give equal airtime to opposing political candidates… because nothing protects free speech like government instructions on who gets to talk.” The rule, backed by FCC Chair Brendan Carr, […]
WASHINGTON — In what experts are calling “one of the most unintentionally hilarious speeches in modern politics,” Eric Trump delivered a blistering attack on nepotism Sunday. His main targets were “other countries” and “their leaders” who only rise to power because of their famous fathers. Speaking with remarkable confidence, Trump blasted Iran’s new Supreme Leader […]
LAREDO, Texas – In a ceremony that historians are already describing as “deeply unnecessary,” U.S. Senator Ted Cruz was officially named “Mr. South Texas 2026” by the Washington’s Birthday Celebration Association. An organization apparently dedicated to proving that awards can always get a little sillier. The honor was presented at the Laredo Country Club, where […]